He is the Vine

Here are some strong words of comfort from a modern-day apostle, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland. I hope you find as much strength from them as I did.

Jesus said, “Without me ye can do nothing.”

I testify that that is God’s truth.

Christ is everything to us and we are to “abide” in Him

permanently,

unyieldingly,

steadfastly,

forever.

For the fruit of the gospel to blossom and bless our lives, we must be firmly attached to Him, the Savior of us all, and to this His Church, which bears His holy name.

He is the vine that is our true source of strength and the only source of eternal life.

In Him we not only will endure but also will prevail and triumph in this holy cause that will never fail us.

May we never fail it nor fail Him I pray in the sacred and holy name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Blue Birds Fly

I love the Wizard of Oz. The older I get the more I treasure the story. This year is the 70th anniversary of the MGM movie. I have always loved the witches in Oz and this year I am lucky to have two of the characters living under my roof. Enjoy some pictures I took of my little witches this fall.

Piles and Piles of Leaves

I love fall. I love the changing of the seasons. I love the crisp cool winds and the crisp cool apples. I love that all things denote there is a God.

The World was created in and with perfect order. Every living thing points to His immaculate order. Consider the changing colors in the fall. The fiery brilliance of the refining color that proceeds the shedding of old leaves and the forming of new buds. We witness this fire of color with our human eye, but cannot see the tiny buds that lay latent until the new spring.

Sometimes we may take it for granted, or simply have not considered, the way the changing trees mimic the Lord's infinite Atonement and Resurrection. Sometimes we may not want that burst of color accompanied by the constant heat of refinement. Sometimes it may seem we have lost it all, as a piece of our heart falls helplessly to the cold ground like a withered brown leaf. Yet, as we are faithful, we will always have that inner strength within us to look beyond the piles, upon never ending piles, of dried up leaves IF our sturdy trunk is deeply rooted within our Savior's soil.

These leaves of sorrow, despair, disappointment, loneliness, ongoing repentance, pride, pain, regret, grief and every other distraction that darkens our summer skies will be no match for the latent bud of strength grafted in our veins to grow once more; stronger, brighter, than before. We will cycle through that seasonal refinement again and again and again until one day it will be the end and He will welcome us home.

"And because of your diligence and your faith and your patience with the word in nourishing it, that it may take root in you, behold, by and by ye shall pluck the fruit thereof, which is most precious, which is sweet above all that is sweet, and which is white above all that is white, yea, and pure above all that is pure; and ye shall feast upon this fruit even until ye are filled, that ye hunger not, neither shall ye thirst."

The Book of Mormon (Alma 32:42)

I Love NY

I love New York City. True, I have only visited there once when I was a child, but I feel very close to that city. Someday I will go there and breath in the excitement lingering in the city air. I will take in a great Broadway production, and secretly wish to be on the stage. I will eat some pizza, stop by Letterman, and shop the shops. I will go there, someday. But beyond the romance of this city, is the heartache of a terrible break-up. The break-up that shocked our nation and caused such horrific tragedy. Of course, I am referring the events of 9.11.01. I know I am not alone when I say I will never forget that day. Our lives changed that day. Our nation changed.

One thing that always remains constant in a world full of noise and tumult is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I remember the worry I had for my growing family. I remember being settled by the message of the peaceable gospel. I remember hearing the Prophet's calming counsel. I remember 9.11, nearly every day.

I am so grateful for the Way of the gospel and the comfort I find in the gospel truth. When terror strikes, we can find hope in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

One day I will visit New York City. I will walk to Ground Zero and silently I will offer a prayer of gratitude. I will thank my Heavenly Father for all I have, and for the knowledge that allows me to Hope.

And then there were three

It is back to school again. I am happy for the children and sad for the children. We have such a wonderful school here and loving teachers. I feel so lucky to live where we live.

Last year at this time, I was a little unsure because we had just moved into the neighborhood. I did not know the school, the teachers, or the neighbors. It felt nice this year to see some familiar faces. I felt a sense of comfort. I felt safe. These sound feelings try to keep my emotions at bay. Yet, I WORRY for my little ones. However, I know there are lessons each child must learn without me physically at their side. I am sure our Heavenly Father feels the same way. Except He never leaves us alone. He loves my little ones even more than I can possibly comprehend. He loves me.

I wonder if He held my hand just before I left His side. I know He knew the tests I would take. I know He watches over me. I know there are lessons on Earth I must take without seeing Him with my physical eyes. But as I trust Him, He will guide me. It is with this faith that I lead my little ones by the hand and carefully let go. I know He is there watching over them, when I cannot be there. Because I know this truth, I breath a little easier as my most dear venture out into the world.

Here is handsome Coulson. Watch out fifth grade, this one is a heartbreaker!

Sweet Sarah, onto third grade.

And crazy KATE. Our brand new kindergarten kid. Look out world! HERE SHE IS!!

Follow, follow, follow

I had a different blog I was going to write, but I came across this extremely contradictory picture in my iphoto and I was led a different way! Here I am on my birthday a year and a half ago. My mother and my children both gave me very similar gifts, as you can see. Look at the items surrounding me: hope, peace, joy, a beautiful Christmas tree, stars twinkling, a print of the Savior and the wicked witch?? There must be something seriously wrong with me!?! Please do not answer that!

I will admit, it is funny. I look so happy, so comfortable, among such confusion! Simply put, I do enjoy a little healthy Oz time. This provides balance in my life. One of my favorite LDS author's is Brent Top. Here's what he said about balance, "Keeping the daily demands of life in balance is one of the great tasks of mortality. There is no peace for those whose lives are out of balance temporally or spiritually."

I am not by any means suggesting we should balance ourselves by being like Mrs. Gulch, AKA the Wicked Witch of the West. I am however suggesting to myself, "Enjoy this journey, we call the test, and laugh a little at a silly, green skinned witch."

I want to always remember there really is no place like HOME! Our earthly homes can be a haven, while our heavenly home is being earned and created for us now. I do strive to find the peace, love, and joy during my journey down the yellow brick road. And let me say, and I am sure you would concur, that these yellow brick roads are not at all like the one in the classic movie!! They are rocky and steep, low and dark, bright and warm, lonely and sad, ongoing and long, but WORTH EVERY STEP if we hold onto the iron rod. Our iron rod, like Dorothy's RED ruby slippers, must be with us always to lead us safely home.

Happy Birthday Dad

Well, I was doing fine today until I went to my mom's blog. Wow, thanks mom. Today is my Dad's birthday. It pretty much sucks. Sorry, but there really isn't a better way to put it.

About two months before my Dad died, I had a dream that he was going to die. I was very upset by this dream. I told some friends about it, and I think they thought I was being a little over dramatic, but I wasn't. The dream was very real and I asked my husband for a priesthood blessing. In the blessing he said that my Dad would be around as long as I needed him. He also said that my mother would need me to support her for a very long time. I felt relieved after this blessing. I thought he would be around a very long time, because I NEEDED him. I was pregnant with our first child. I needed him to be his grandpa. I needed his advice. I needed his common sense. I needed his bear hugs. I needed his energy. I needed his laugh. I needed his confidence. I needed his wisdom. I needed his strength. I needed his example. I was relieved by the blessing because I needed him. I needed him. I was just barely getting to know my Dad as an adult. I was learning from him.

On November 15, 1998, I called my mother, as I always tried to do on Sunday. My Dad answered the phone. I said,

"Hi, Dad, is Mom there?"

Those were the last words I ever said to him. Sometimes I am angry I wasn't prompted to talk a little longer with him. Sometimes I feel I may have received that prompting, but perhaps I did not recognize the still small voice. But, for whatever reason, those were our last words. He died suddenly the next morning. It was my parents 30 wedding anniversary. He was just 50 years of age. He had woke up early to take my younger siblings to early morning seminary. He bent over to tie his shoes and that was his last mortal act on Earth.

I miss my Dad terribly. Our lives are very different with him gone. He was my hero. I often reflect on that priesthood blessing. I am amazed by our Lord's matchless power and wisdom. He knew my Dad would be taken. He reassured me that my Dad would be around as long as I needed him. Although I haven't seen my Dad with my physical eyes for nearly eleven years, I have felt his influence in my life. He has been there for me when I have needed him around. I miss him so. But because of the truth we have in the restored gospel, I know he lives on and one day we will be together again. I can not wait for that sweet reunion. We will be together Dad! I will be faithful, and I will make you pleased with me.

I do try, as instructed, to support my Mother. The Lord knew of her pain and what she would face in the months and years to come. I hope I am a support to her, and that I am fulfilling my duty to my Father, and my Heavenly Father.

Next time I talk to my Dad. I will not say, "Hi, Dad, is Mom there?" I will say, "Hi, Dad, thanks for being my dad for twenty-two years on earth. Thanks for those days, now let's spend eternity together!!" I CAN'T WAIT. What a day that will be!